American Idol Idiot

I have a dirty little secret I’d like to finally get off my chest. No, it’s not that! Everyone knows that I was born a woman! It’s that I like to watch American Idol, The Voice and X-Factor. I know that you’re thinking I should be cynical about these shows but I think these three shows are different from other “reality shows.” You’re right about most of those kinds of shows. I can’t stand shows with non-actors, celebrity dancers or some evil housewife. Who wants to watch these ordinary (or in most cases under-ordinary) people? And America’s Got Talent is as bad as the Gong Show ever was. Now I am not one who calls or texts in votes or downloads any of the performances and I would not buy the albums from any of these artists and do not go to any of their concerts when they tour. In fact, they rarely sing songs that I like and sing most of the songs that I hate, like “Take Another Little Piece Of My Heart”. Ugh! In fact half the time I’m yelling things like “You’re flat!” “Good God, that’s awful!” “That’s not the melody!” “Pick a song in your vocal range, you idiot!” “You’re in the wrong key!” “You sound EXACTLY like Dave Matthews!” So why do I watch?


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